Anger Coaching

Of course, we all get angry at times. But if you’re feeling angry constantly – daily – hourly – then something is wrong.  Anger getting out of control is a sign that something probably needs to change.  Better anger managment via coaching can be an ideal way to enable a new way forward from the ground roots level and provide lasting change.  Transformational change, some might call it.  There’s no point in just smoothing over the surface when it comes to anger management.  There’s far too much at stake.

Benefits of Being Coached

Being coached in anger management certainly doesn’t intend to encourage one to ignore or suppress anger, as the term ‘anger management’ may imply.  It’s important to express anger at the right time in the right way – ‘appropriate anger’, they call it.  But uncontrolled or unchecked anger means we’re not thinking clearly or making reasonable choices.  We’re lacking in the self awareness that is required to help us have better self control. Anger management coaching aims to connect with the underlying issues that result in angry outbursts or negative behaviour.  By working with your anger management coach to identify why and when one feels angry, we can begin to diffuse the power it holds. By being here and reading about anger management it suggests the intention to own anger and angry behaviour – and to acknowledge and issue exists is sometimes half the battle won.

Feelings and emotions

It’s been said that ‘anger is a secondary emotion’- meaning there’s usually some other emotion underlying it.  When people feel shame, or hurt, extreme sadness or fear, it can be the fuel for a protective coating of anger.  With good techniques and the connection one gets with their coach, beneficial results are achievable. Firstly understanding that anger stems from our natural fight or flight response – a basic survival mechanism – is a helpful discussion for most people. And, there are many more helpful aspects to anger that we consider.

Perspectives different from one’s own

One of the techniques we find helps our clients is to work to understand why something that makes us insanely angry can be ‘nothing’ to someone else.  In other words, how anger is triggered and why it affects us as it does.  Discovering where our anger comes from and knowing we need to ‘get it out’ is a great start.  We can deal with surfacing anger more effectively when we know it’s coming.

Greater awareness of oneself and others

With understanding of what makes others ‘tick’ and what triggers us to anger, we can begin to see issues arising – before they do.  Prewarned is forearmed, as the saying goes.  Putting a space between predicting something will go wrong and it arriving gives us time to diffuse an angry situation. Your anger coach can work with you to help you get your needs met, without it being at the expense of others.

Clarity around life roles, goals and desires

Stress can arise when we’re living life ‘out of kilter’.  Whilst we may not be able to totally switch out our life roles and responsibilities to be perfectly aligned with what we want to do, clarity is the starting point.  Seeing where there’s a mismatch between how thing are in the present moment, and how we’d like them to be, helps set the scene for better stress management.

Increased self-confidence and self-esteem

With an understanding of one’s needs and that it is valid that they need to be met comes a greater sense of self-worth.  Working on ways to be the person you have always wanted to be, and achieve the dreams you’ve always wanted to is possible when we work with you on a personal level.

New approach

Many of the normal and healthy human emotions are really difficult to deal with, such as anxiety, sadness and fear.  However, anger tends to be the one thing that many of us have the most difficulty managing.  When we’re under pressure daily and patterns are repeating constantly, we can get a lot of practice being angry.  It becomes a habit that’s really difficult to break out of.

That’s why the very greatest benefit of working with your anger coach on a regular basis helps to change these patterns around.

Anger Coaching – What Exactly is it?

It isn’t counselling or psychology or psychiatry.  These approaches will often focus on delving into past traumas or making psychological assessments of the person seeking assistance.  If you feel this level of therapy is what you require, please do seek out the appropriately qualified medical professional.

A coach works alongside you, rather like a peer, and the relationship is based on trust, respect and collaboration.  The beauty of the course of training we share when we work together is that it’s likely you’ll learn a whole bunch of ‘stuff’ that makes complete sense.  And, is completely practical, do-able and effective for a lifetime. It’s also possible to apply the new techniques to almost all areas of your life, and so making things a whole lot better with family and friends as well as your day job.

Why didn’t anyone tell me this stuff?

You see, most of us missed out on some basics when we were growing up.  We learned reading, writing and arithmetic at school.  However, hardly any of us learned about emotions or how to manage them.  Furthermore, we were at the mercy of the adults around us as to the messages we received about ourselves.  If the adults around us weren’t too skilled at compassion or kindness or tact, we tended to get a bit – ‘damaged’.  And hence, the cycle begins (or rather, continues).  If our needs weren’t met, if we were forced to suppress emotions, if we felt unfairly dealt with – we suppressed emotions.  Eventually, as adults, these suppressed emotions sometimes turn into anger issues.

And, so, here we are.

Anger management

By working with an anger coach one can unpack how to recognise our feelings, our reactions, our unmet needs.  Once this all makes sense, anger management becomes less of an issue and considerably more achievable.  It is unlikely to happen overnight, but it can certainly happen with the right approach to anger issues.  At Anger Management Brisbane, we’ve been there.  We understand what it takes and how to compassionately guide a person through the process of hurt, misunderstood, easily angered person, to self-aware, confident and empowered individual.

What happens to the anger?

This process is particularly exciting in that it serves to help transform the energy of anger into positive channels to benefit your life and relationships with those in it.  Often, our clients tell us they feel ‘heard’ for the first time.

Your Anger Management Brisbane coach works alongside you as a peer who has been in a tough place and developed skills worked to over come their own challenges and issues.  As such, they’re more of a coach and accountability buddy – with coaching skills and qualifications – than an observer,  analyst or academically qualified practitioner able to prescribe you.

In essence, you could likely find the assistance you need, make the transformation you want to by working with your anger coach.  The very respectful, private and personal service we offer is an accessible, viable and empowering pathway to become the person you want to be.  This can all take place without a medical record or any of the possible stigma attached to it.  You probably don’t have anything medically or psychologically wrong with you. You may simply need some critical bits of information, a wise listening ear and coaching and guidance to find your best way through your challenges.

At Anger Management Brisbane, this is how we help.

Who Goes for Anger Coaching?

All sorts of good, kind, loving everyday individuals seek out anger management coaching.  We often find those who approach us to get assistance with anger management skills are genuinely great people.  They’re often gentle and kind and are astounded at and distressed by the anger issues they experience.

People carrying a great deal of stress and responsibility in the workplace seek help.  Professionals and executives, managers and employers and employees and business owners all have high demands placed on them.  Anger may be an issue for them at work, or at home.  Anger issues sometimes show themselves in bouts of road rage, arguments, destruction of property and regular conflict with colleagues, family or friends.  If any of these ring true for you, you are not alone, and you are not a bad person.  You’re likely a candidate for anger management coaching who will find the process life-transforming.

If you wish to manage your anger better, coaching will help you understand it clearly and what to do about it.  You’ll develop your own resources and tools to manage your anger so you are the one in control.

Being Coached in Anger Management – What to Expect

Your meetings with Anger Management Brisbane will feel rather like a conversation on the phone with a trusted friend.  You’ll feel comfortable and respected.  Sessions are generally held weekly on the telephone.  Zoom sessions are also available, if you’d prefer.

Firstly, you’ll feel listened to and heard.  There is ample opportunity to explain what’s going on, what bothers you and to ‘get it off your chest’.  We don’t hurry our clients up to get finished on-the-dot in the session!  Because, sometimes it takes as long as it takes.  Yes, we’ll ask clarifying questions so your points are clearly understood.  But it’s up to you how much or how little you share.

Secondly, we’ll share with you some enlightening facts and observations that will reveal things to you that you may not realise, or may have forgotten or overlooked.  Our insights give us a basis to discuss what might be going on behind the issues you’ve described to us.  If that’s the case, you’ll recognise it clearly.  It won’t be us telling you something you don’t believe!  There’s no technical jargon and no blame.

How long will I need to be coached?

Subsequent sessions will work on each individual factor that helps you work towards understanding your triggers to anger and beginning to manage your response to those anger triggers.  By developing constructive outlets for your pent up anger reserves you’ll gain confidence in your ability to mange your emotions in a healthy way.  Regaining control over your emotions and behaviour is incredibly empowering. Some people feel confident to go out on their own after just a few sessions. Others find the process so life-changing they continue with coaching to work on other areas of their personal success.

Becoming adept at your own anger management can be transformational, and it may be all you need to get your life on track. We offer an initial free consultation and currently have capacity to take on new clients. Our clients include couples as well as individuals.